Comments on: 8 Things that Destroyed Our Marriage Part 6 (Repost) http://refineus.org/2010/03/8-things-that-destroyed-our-marriage-part-6-repost/ Restoring Hope | Renewing Relationships Wed, 08 Feb 2012 19:10:26 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Trish Davis http://refineus.org/2010/03/8-things-that-destroyed-our-marriage-part-6-repost/comment-page-1/#comment-2060 Trish Davis Sun, 07 Mar 2010 00:13:13 +0000 http://refineus.org/?p=1595#comment-2060 Michelle I am so sorry! We will be praying for you, your husband and your three boys! Michelle

I am so sorry! We will be praying for you, your husband and your three boys!

]]> By: Trish Davis http://refineus.org/2010/03/8-things-that-destroyed-our-marriage-part-6-repost/comment-page-1/#comment-2059 Trish Davis Sun, 07 Mar 2010 00:11:35 +0000 http://refineus.org/?p=1595#comment-2059 Liz, I am so sorry for your pain! I completely understand where you are coming from. I think for me personally forgiveness has more to do with me than the person(s) that I need to offer forgiveness too. Regardless if it is Justin, a family member or friend withholding forgiveness does more damage to me than I think it does to them. Don't get me wrong, I don't think that you should be a door mat! I believe that being angry is a gift from God! But when that anger turns to bitterness and resentment not only is it sinful it takes a toll on you physically, emotionally and spiritually. Over time God has taught me to recognize the difference between being angry and being captive by my anger. BUT that doesn't mean I choose God's way every time! Jesus has been the best example of forgiveness for me. When Justin and I were separated I prayed and filled my journal up with some really nasty prayers to God. I was so angry and felt like He let me down. But each day Jesus brought me new clarity that HE totally gets where I am coming from! He knows what its like to continually be betrayed, lied too and abandon even to the point that on the cross he yelled out to the Father for leaving him! Once I understood the difference between being angry and staying angry the next step was to learn to TRUST Jesus. I had to trust He knows what I am feeling and that He is powerful enough to help me not only offer forgiveness to others but find freedom in doing so. Its been a process for me but one that has been life changing! Its just my perspective but I hope it helps! ~Trish Liz,
I am so sorry for your pain! I completely understand where you are coming from. I think for me personally forgiveness has more to do with me than the person(s) that I need to offer forgiveness too. Regardless if it is Justin, a family member or friend withholding forgiveness does more damage to me than I think it does to them.

Don't get me wrong, I don't think that you should be a door mat! I believe that being angry is a gift from God! But when that anger turns to bitterness and resentment not only is it sinful it takes a toll on you physically, emotionally and spiritually. Over time God has taught me to recognize the difference between being angry and being captive by my anger. BUT that doesn't mean I choose God's way every time!

Jesus has been the best example of forgiveness for me. When Justin and I were separated I prayed and filled my journal up with some really nasty prayers to God. I was so angry and felt like He let me down. But each day Jesus brought me new clarity that HE totally gets where I am coming from! He knows what its like to continually be betrayed, lied too and abandon even to the point that on the cross he yelled out to the Father for leaving him!

Once I understood the difference between being angry and staying angry the next step was to learn to TRUST Jesus. I had to trust He knows what I am feeling and that He is powerful enough to help me not only offer forgiveness to others but find freedom in doing so. Its been a process for me but one that has been life changing! Its just my perspective but I hope it helps!

~Trish

]]> By: Trish Davis http://refineus.org/2010/03/8-things-that-destroyed-our-marriage-part-6-repost/comment-page-1/#comment-2058 Trish Davis Sat, 06 Mar 2010 16:08:00 +0000 http://refineus.org/?p=1595#comment-2058 That's awesome Jason! I wish it was a one time deal but somehow over time I can feel this old pattern creep-up in my mind and I have to give it over to God not to give into it! That's awesome Jason! I wish it was a one time deal but somehow over time I can feel this old pattern creep-up in my mind and I have to give it over to God not to give into it!

]]> By: Lee Buford http://refineus.org/2010/03/8-things-that-destroyed-our-marriage-part-6-repost/comment-page-1/#comment-6795 Lee Buford Sat, 06 Mar 2010 05:48:47 +0000 http://refineus.org/?p=1595#comment-6795 <span class="topsy_trackback_comment"><span class="topsy_twitter_username"><span class="topsy_trackback_content">If you struggle to forgive, this REPOST written by @trishadavis23 is a powerful read! http://bit.ly/caEBaX (via @justindavis33)</span></span> If you struggle to forgive, this REPOST written by @trishadavis23 is a powerful read! http://bit.ly/caEBaX (via @justindavis33)

]]> By: trishadavis23 http://refineus.org/2010/03/8-things-that-destroyed-our-marriage-part-6-repost/comment-page-1/#comment-6796 trishadavis23 Sat, 06 Mar 2010 04:53:32 +0000 http://refineus.org/?p=1595#comment-6796 <span class="topsy_trackback_comment"><span class="topsy_twitter_username"><span class="topsy_trackback_content">RT @justindavis33: If you struggle to forgive, this REPOST written by @trishadavis23 is a powerful read! http://bit.ly/caEBaX #fb</span></span> RT @justindavis33: If you struggle to forgive, this REPOST written by @trishadavis23 is a powerful read! http://bit.ly/caEBaX #fb

]]> By: Michelle http://refineus.org/2010/03/8-things-that-destroyed-our-marriage-part-6-repost/comment-page-1/#comment-2055 Michelle Sat, 06 Mar 2010 03:08:55 +0000 http://refineus.org/?p=1595#comment-2055 My husband confessed an affair to me this morning. We have three precious boys and I know that God led me to this site for a reason (that was several weeks ago...I had NO idea). I would've never dreamed it would hit so close to home for me today. Thanks for your ministry. I hope that our marriage can be restored. Please pray for us. My husband confessed an affair to me this morning. We have three precious boys and I know that God led me to this site for a reason (that was several weeks ago…I had NO idea). I would've never dreamed it would hit so close to home for me today. Thanks for your ministry. I hope that our marriage can be restored. Please pray for us.

]]> By: Jason Wert http://refineus.org/2010/03/8-things-that-destroyed-our-marriage-part-6-repost/comment-page-1/#comment-6797 Jason Wert Sat, 06 Mar 2010 01:04:28 +0000 http://refineus.org/?p=1595#comment-6797 <span class="topsy_trackback_comment"><span class="topsy_twitter_username"><span class="topsy_trackback_content">A knockout post from @trishadavis23 today. The power of forgiveness is huge! http://bit.ly/caEBaX</span></span> A knockout post from @trishadavis23 today. The power of forgiveness is huge! http://bit.ly/caEBaX

]]> By: liz http://refineus.org/2010/03/8-things-that-destroyed-our-marriage-part-6-repost/comment-page-1/#comment-2054 liz Sat, 06 Mar 2010 00:47:00 +0000 http://refineus.org/?p=1595#comment-2054 I struggle with this. I do not know how to forgive a certain act when the act keeps reappearing in our lives over and over again. I feel like a foolish clown being knocked on the head by a bat over and over again! How can I forgive when he doesn't even want forgiveness. He just wants to know that he's right and doesn't do things wrong. I am struggling to have Jesus be the lover and protector of my soul. Just finding it difficult to see how the pain produced by my husband fits in and for how long can I deal with this.... I don't know how to forgive, especially while I am still hurting on a daily basis. I try, but then I get hurt yet again! I struggle with this. I do not know how to forgive a certain act when the act keeps reappearing in our lives over and over again. I feel like a foolish clown being knocked on the head by a bat over and over again! How can I forgive when he doesn't even want forgiveness. He just wants to know that he's right and doesn't do things wrong. I am struggling to have Jesus be the lover and protector of my soul. Just finding it difficult to see how the pain produced by my husband fits in and for how long can I deal with this…. I don't know how to forgive, especially while I am still hurting on a daily basis. I try, but then I get hurt yet again!

]]> By: Marriage Tips http://refineus.org/2010/03/8-things-that-destroyed-our-marriage-part-6-repost/comment-page-1/#comment-6798 Marriage Tips Fri, 05 Mar 2010 23:30:57 +0000 http://refineus.org/?p=1595#comment-6798 <span class="topsy_trackback_comment"><span class="topsy_twitter_username"><span class="topsy_trackback_content">RT @justindavis33: If you struggle to forgive, this REPOST written by @trishadavis23 is a powerful read! http://bit.ly/caEBaX #fb</span></span> RT @justindavis33: If you struggle to forgive, this REPOST written by @trishadavis23 is a powerful read! http://bit.ly/caEBaX #fb

]]> By: rebeccannb http://refineus.org/2010/03/8-things-that-destroyed-our-marriage-part-6-repost/comment-page-1/#comment-6799 rebeccannb Fri, 05 Mar 2010 23:24:49 +0000 http://refineus.org/?p=1595#comment-6799 <span class="topsy_trackback_comment"><span class="topsy_twitter_username"><span class="topsy_trackback_content">RT @justindavis33: If you struggle to forgive, this REPOST written by @trishadavis23 is a powerful read! http://bit.ly/caEBaX #fb</span></span> RT @justindavis33: If you struggle to forgive, this REPOST written by @trishadavis23 is a powerful read! http://bit.ly/caEBaX #fb

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