August 18, 2010 in Accountability,Faith,Truth with 37 Comments

2 Months From Now

Sin has a way of messing with your mind. It wears you down. I think that sin’s greatest strength is not that it causes you to take giant leaps away from God…its that it lures you into tiny, unnoticeable, justifiable steps. It doesn’t always come against you with blatant lies; it just distorts and twists the truth. It hides, it compromises, it shades, and it bends.

What we begin to believe is that choosing our own way will work out. It will be okay. We can get over it. People will heal. It’s not that big of a deal. What we begin to convince ourselves of is 2 months from now…life will be better.

Maybe you’re contemplating sin right now. It talks to you. It taunts you.

It’s not an affair…it’s just text messages. A little Internet porn never hurt anyone. You deserve to have someone listen to you, and if your husband won’t you’re your old boyfriend on Facebook is the next best thing.  Your wife doesn’t admire or respect you anymore, but your secretary does. Leaving your wife won’t damage your kids that much. Telling one lie doesn’t make you a liar. It’s not cheating; you’re just being flirtatious.

I.Have.Been.There.

When I told my wife that I didn’t want to be married anymore; that I would be happier without her; that she would be happier without me; I was leaving her; it was because I had convinced myself that my way will be better. 2 months from now, it will all blow over and life will be back to normal.

Can I share with you from personal experience…if you are contemplating or involved sin…here is what I learned the hard way:

  • 2 months from now the grass will not be greener
  • 2 months from now the lie will not be truth
  • 2 months from now your kids will not be over it
  • 2 months from now your pornography addiction will not be more manageable
  • 2 months from now text messages will be more sensual not less
  • 2 months from now seeing your kids every other weekend will still suck
  • 2 months from now you won’t be happier without your wife
  • 2 months from now what you’re hiding will not be easier to bury
  • 2 months from now your ability to carry your regret will dwindle
  • 2 months from now you’ll be further away from God than you ever thought possible

We are a product of our decisions. What you decide today…the compromise you choose today…the justification you settle for today…will greatly affect who you are and who you become 2 months from now.

Has sin ever blinded you to the consequences of  your choices?

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  • Pete

    More times than I would like to admit!!

    The two month test is a great one.

  • http://movingthroughlife.wordpress.com/ Joseph

    Great post.

    I am not in a spot where I am contemplating sin right now but am finding it very difficult to enjoy my life. My career is totally overwhelming and is taking every emotional fiber I have which in turn makes every day a rough one.
    Looking at steps to fix it and be a better husband/father but the stress is overwhelming.

    The reason I even mention this is because your two month test still applies. The actions I take today can drastically change where I am two months from now. Which I hope is one heck of a lot better place than I am right this moment.

  • Carolyn

    Joseph,

    Been there with work so I REALLY do understand. Wish I could help more than just being ‘here’ and offering to listen.

    Every situation is different so I’m not going to list what the issues were for me here (this is your post, not mine) , but if you need/want ‘chat’/ you know where I am.

    Keep on keeping on.

  • http://aaronshaver.com Aaron Shaver

    Once again, I soooooo appreciate your posts.
    But they are so hard to read.
    Thanks for the honesty, Justin.

  • Anonymous

    I think this is why I’m fighting so hard to keep John and I connected… because I can see 2 months from now, if we don’t learn to connect, really connect, we’ll continue drifting farther apart – just like you said. If we don’t learn to talk TO each other, we’ll start talking AT each other. Two months from now… it won’t be better, it will be worse. I so appreciated y’alls words last nite during our session… it helped a ton – just hearing that I’m not crazy for fighting to keep us connected. Sometimes it feels like that :)

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  • Ani

    This post is so tough. And honest. Doesn’t sin do that to you? It makes you think it will be better if you keep doing it. But in the end you feel more miserable than you did and it feels as God is far away and not worthy to go to Him again. But I’m glad He waits for us. Always. I also believe that the right people in your life is important too. Thanks for sharing.

    This has nothing to do with your post today but I totally love the new look of your site. Sorry, I wasn’t there to congratulate, so here it is. Congratulations and praying it will be used for His glory.

  • http://www.jcwert.com Jason Wert

    Yeah, I’ve been there way more often than I care to admit.

  • http://silenthearts.wordpress.com/ Morgan MacGavin

    yes…it’s something I struggle with on a daily basis as I attempt to let go of the things that use to define me. Im not gonna lie, I’ve definitely slipped up a few times lately and have prayed for Gods forgiveness again. I’m figuring out I cant live in a way like I HAVE time to fix what I did wrong. So I need to be doing it right the first time.

    Great post Justin!

  • Stephanie

    I am sure that there is really something profound I should be saying here…but all I can think,over and over again, is “then how can he still be doing it?” How can my husband live every day, hiding from the world because of his sin (our world, not his “new” world), not seeing his kids except every other weekend, rolling around in dead brown “grass”, swearing the whole time its greener….how can he not see?.?.?

  • http://refineus.org/ Justin and Trisha

    you are so right. Andy Stanley calls this this the principle of the path. I will be praying for your career path.

  • http://refineus.org/ Justin and Trisha

    Me too my friend!

  • http://refineus.org/ Justin and Trisha

    Thanks Aaron! Hope you are well!

  • http://refineus.org/ Justin and Trisha

    Thanks Carolyn!

  • http://refineus.org/ Justin and Trisha

    Wow…stephanie…I am so sorry. i know that there isn’t a nice pretty bow to put on every situation. Sometimes, it takes time for sin to catch up…but it always does. I am sorry for your hurt, your kids hurt and the paint that you didn’t choose. We are praying for you.

  • http://refineus.org/ Justin and Trisha

    We all have.

  • http://refineus.org/ Justin and Trisha

    Thanks Morgan…it is a journey. My encouragement to you is to reach out to some friends at CP and allow them to walk with you as you move closer to Christ. We are praying for you.

  • http://refineus.org/ Justin and Trisha

    So true…it always makes you think that it will be better. Thanks for the congrats too!

  • Pam

    Sin is blinding…I rationalized everything. I deserve someone who really loves me. He can take me or leave me. I’m not going to wear my wedding ring because I don’t “feel”" married. Now those were lies from the pit of hell.
    Now I see clearly…I can’t imagine thinking all those things. I have come out of the darkness and into the light. Thank God!

  • http://www.anewlifehartz.blogspot.com Lindsey @ A New Life

    Amen Amen Amen. AMEN!

  • http://refineus.org/ Justin and Trisha

    Jenny…so few couples are willing to fight for their marriage and for intimacy like you and John are…we are so proud of you! We are here for you and know that God has great plans for your marriage!

  • http://refineus.org/ Justin and Trisha

    Thank you so much Pam for your honesty. All sin must be justified at some level because it has to be explained away. Thank you for being so real and transparent!

  • http://silenthearts.wordpress.com/ Morgan MacGavin

    Thank you…I’m learning to do that too. It sounds weird to say this, but having all these new and wonderful people in my life is a little awkward. I’m so used to turning to other friends–but the very hard lesson I’m going through right now is that many of them don’t want to be turned to in my Christian life. God’s been instilling confidence in me to reach out to others though, and it *has* helped. I’m so blessed to be apart of the CP community and Stretch!! Amazing people!

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  • Lindseyrnobles

    Never thought about it that way…good stuff.

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  • http://movingthroughlife.wordpress.com/ Joseph

    Thanks Carolyn. Having a shoulder sometimes is all we need.

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  • Eddie

    This is some good stuff! I just started following your blog today, but how I wish I had come across this a couple of months ago. I cheated on my girlfriend whom I was planning on marrying in the near future. I saw everything fading really slow, but I thought that I could get myself out of it. You know, with out the help of anyone else. I was so wrong. My girlfriend and I didn’t live in the same city so the last time she visited me I consumed with guilt and couldn’t even make her feel welcome. A week later God finally answered my prayers and place me in a position where the only way out was to confess to her. It has been 3 weeks since then and it has been really hard, but God has been faithful through all of this. I see Him doing great things in both of our lives because of this.

    Now I am doing all I can to repair my relationship with God and I’m becoming the man that He has called me to be. Still, its no easy to accept that I jeopardized an amazing relationship. Still praying that God will renew that broken relationship, so that we can be married some day.

    Thanks for you testimony!

  • http://refineus.org/ Justin and Trisha

    Wow Eddie…thanks for your honesty! So glad you found us here. If we can serve you in any way or help you please let me know. We will be praying for your journey and your relationship with both God and your girlfriend.

  • LS

    justin. . .i have been ‘chewing’ ((so to speak)) on this post for the past three days and i know this is going to sound absolutely crazy, but i found it encouraging in my current circumstance. i am hoping that many of these feelings you express in this post are beginning to catch up with my ex-fiance. i hope that he is seeing that ‘getting rid’ of me cannot ‘fix’ the sin. no matter what happens between the two of us, i want him to have a restored relationship with the Lord and be set free from the captivity of pride and pornography.

    when everything went down, he said over and over again that ‘it would hurt for a month of two but then everything would be back to normal.’ well, month’s later, it isn’t all better. what you said to trish about not wanting to be married anymore, not loving her anymore, etc. are the exact same words i heard from my beloved five months ago.

    and goodness, i would be totally looking at the spec in his eye and missing the log in mine if i didn’t say that i see that my big mistakes come from little compromises in the little things. . .as always, thanks for letting the Lord use your life, trials, and fingertips. . .

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