September 7, 2010 in Faith,Family,Marriage,Transformation with 15 Comments

I Should Vs. I Want To

There are a lot of things that I know I should do.

In my relationship with God, “I should” has crossed my mind hundreds of times. I should read my Bible more. I should spend more time in prayer. I should journal more consistently. I should show more grace. I should worship God in more ways that just singing on Sundays. I should give more.

I’m great at telling myself, “I should.” I should workout more. I should eat better. I should get up earlier. I should run a mini-marathon. I should get out of debt. I should read more. I should write more.

The same can be said about my marriage. I should listen more. I should give Trisha my best. I should help with the kids. I should lead our family more spiritually. I should engage as much at home as I do at the office. I should not be so controlling.

My life as a father has been filled with “I should.” I should take the boys camping. I should not lose my temper so easily. I should be more patient. I should spend quality time with each of the boys. I should help him with his homework. I should pray more with them.

The problem with I should is that it will never change your life. For transformation to truly take place in your life, you have to move from “I should” to “I want to.” It is about desire.

If I don’t desire to read my Bible more than I desire watching Sportscenter, change will not happen. If I don’t desire time with my wife more than I desire time at the office, she will never feel like a priority. If I don’t desire spending time with my boys more than I desire watching golf, I’ll never be a better dad. If I don’t desire working out more than I desire lying on the couch, I’ll never lose weight.

Transformation only takes place as our desire to change aligns with the power of the Holy Spirit to change us. Sometimes that means sacrifice; sometimes it means surrender; sometimes it means confession; sometimes it means humility. It always means moving from “I should” to “I want to.”

Maybe what is holding you back from changing is that your desires are too weak. You have settled for a life of “I should” and haven’t embraced a life of “I want to.”

What area of your life do you need to move from “I Should” to “I Want To”?

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  • http://jskogerboe.com/ jskogerboe

    Great post brother. I agree with you, and the passage that came to mind as I read this was Psalm 37:4 > “Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you your heart’s desires.” When I was younger, I used to think that meant whatever my heart desired, He would give me. As in, I desire a Ferrari. In my heart. But this is better translated, “Intentionally be delighted with God, and stoke your delight in Him, and He’ll place in your heart the desires that line up with His will for you.” So I say AMEN to your post, and the best road I know to the “right” desires is to throw yourself into a passionate, grateful, delighted relationship with God through Jesus Christ. Thanks for the encouragement today to keep first things first. Bless you and Trisha.

    • http://refineus.org/ Justin and Trisha

      love that verse and your interpretation of it!

  • http://www.anewcreation33.wordpress.com Mercedes

    All of the above!

    X

    Mercedes

    • http://refineus.org/ Justin and Trisha

      You are not alone.

  • http://www.pbjcreations.com Lisa

    I should be working out ,but instead I’m here. Thanks for the motivation going to work out right now !

    • http://refineus.org/ Justin and Trisha

      So glad I could help :)

  • http://www.jcwert.com Jason Wert

    Way too many things to write it here. But Amy & I are working on them! :)

    • http://refineus.org/ Justin and Trisha

      That is great jason

  • http://www.writeontheknows.wordpress.com writeontheknows

    I’d be happy moving from “I should” to just an “I will!”
    Thanks for reminding me that I have more power through God than I often think.

    • http://refineus.org/ Justin and Trisha

      So true! Thanks!

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