Being Committed to Your Marriage


I (Justin) want to disclaim this post by saying that I am not a counselor or a therapist by training. I don’t have credentials behind my name, so this post may be contrary to what they teach in text books. I also want to say that the heart of this post is not to give people permission to leave their marriage…it is actually the exact opposite. With that out of…

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2 Words That Will Kill Your Marriage


There are so many things that your marriage can survive. You marriage can survive miscommunication. Your marriage can survive busy schedules. Your marriage can overcome conflict with your in-laws. Your marriage can get through sexual brokenness and unforgiveness. But, there are two words that will eventually bring an end to your marriage…if not legally then definitely emotionally. The two words are… …IF ONLY… If only my wife had sex with…

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A Little At a Time


I remember sitting in a Starbucks parking lot in October 2005, killing time before my first counseling session with Trisha since our separation. We had only seen each other once since I confessed the affair. I was nervous. I was hopeful. I didn’t want to mess this up along with everything else I had messed up. As I sat there my phone rang. God had promoted a long time friend…

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Death By Comparison: Part 2


Yesterday, we talked about a part of our heart that dies when we compare ourselves with others. We often don’t see ourselves how God sees us, we see ourselves in light of our weaknesses and others strengths. I want to talk about a deeper part of our heart and mind that we probably don’t allow others to know about too often. This type of comparison is subtle and it is…

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Drywall, Mulch and Flowers… Knowing My Heart


Everywhere you look in Nashville Tennessee it’s apparent that spring is in the air. Amongst the hills are beautiful colors of purple, white and pink blanketing the trees. It’s this time of the year where I’m reminded of how creative God is and my love for His creation. Our family moved to the house we are currently in the first week of September. Fall had settled in and winter was…

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Withheld Truth


Why is it so easy to hide? Why is it so easy to only share part of the truth? This past week, I had the opportunity to continue our 5 Things Series, you can see the 2 minute MashUp below or  if you are interested watch/listen to the entire message HERE.   In the message I talked about  3 people to whom we have to speak truth: 1. Tell the…

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When In Doubt, Fight For It

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Looking back at that time when our marriage melted down in 2005, Trisha and I thought that the things that we struggled with, the problems that we had and the issues we faced, were unique to us. For the next year and a half, we spent a lot of time identifying our issues, talking about our problems and being honest and transparent about our struggles. As you go through marriage,…

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3 Year Glitch


Yesterday, my friend Steve sent me a link to this article. The opening sentence of the article says: The “three-year glitch” has replaced the “seven-year itch” as the tipping point where couples start to take each other for granted, according to a new survey. Three years…within three years couples take each other for granted. According to this article: Within three years you will stop noticing your wife’s smile. Within three…

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5 Things I Wish I Knew Before I Got Married (Pt.2)


Justin kicked off this mini-series the other day with his 5 Things. Today, I want to share with you 5 Things I wish I knew before we got married. We hope these things are helpful to you as you prepare for marriage or as you grow in your marriage. 1. Doing everything the “Right way” in MY marriage won’t fix all the brokenness of my past. Justin and I got…

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The WHY is So Important


Understanding WHY is imperative. One of the things we’ve learned over the past few years is that WHY we do things in our marriage matters more than WHAT we do. There have been so many times in our marriage that I did something simply to get Trisha off my back. My motivation wasn’t one of love and service, it was to avoid a fight; it was to minimize conflict; it…

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