Judgmental People Make Me Sad

I had coffee with a good friend a few weeks ago. He knew that I had taken some hits since returning to ministry. There are people who think that I shouldn’t be in ministry because I was unfaithful. There are some that think the restoration process we went through wasn’t long enough, exhaustive enough, rigorous enough. There are people who read our blog, or watch our video or listen to me speak and make a judgment about the condition of my heart, and they don’t even know me. He was angry about it, and wanted to encourage me and let me know that he not only believed in me, but he would defend me to anyone that judged me.

He asked for my thoughts…was I mad? I wasn’t mad…surprisingly, I was sad. I just told my friend that my heart was sad. I’m sad for them because they will never experience God’s grace the way that God longs for them to. The grace that cost Jesus everything, the mercy that placed Him on a Roman cross, the love that allowed Him to die in my place, is partially lost on the judgmental heart. That makes me sad.

As I was driving back to the office, I was feeling really spiritual. I was feeling so much more holy than all of those judgmental people. I don’t have a hard heart like them. I don’t try to limit and ration the grace of God in other people’s lives, like they do. Then it hit me.

I realized that I am “those people”. So often in my life, I am the judge and the jury. I judge by someone’s appearance or marital status, or body odor or skin color. I compare myself to others spiritual life, parenting style, decision-making, financial status. I make assumptions about others purely by outward appearances. That makes me sad.  Every time I choose to judge, I rob myself of experiencing God’s grace to its fullest.

The antidote to judgmentalism is gratitude. Being thankful and undone and overwhelmed by our desperate need for grace eliminates judgmentalism in our life.

Living in the truth that Jesus is my only hope; Walking in the reality that while I may look better than you on the outside, I am just as broken and fractured on the inside. Realizing that the ground is level at the foot of the Cross…allows judgment to die in my heart.

Maybe you aren’t experiencing the grace and mercy and wonder of God like you desire because you are robbing yourself of its gift by judging others.

What do you need to be thankful for that will allow you to be less judgmental?